Not measuring up? Boy, do I have good news for you!

It was a rough sleep last night...

A tossing and turning, rolling and moaning, smashing the pillow kind of night.

It's never a good idea to go to bed with an unresolved issue on your mind.

But I was too tired to deal with it so off to bed I went, taking comfort in the thought that a good night's sleep can often cure whatever ails you.

But as I said, it was not a good night's sleep.

And I did not feel cured as the sun slipped over the horizon, through the lace curtains, and into my bleary eyes.

So now I'm sitting here with my "Life is Beautiful, Capture Every Moment" mega-cup of coffee...

Finally thinking clearly and understanding what I should have taken the time last night to work through..

"By daily practicing our trust in Him, we will realize that whatever He calls us to do is always in our best interest, even if it seems difficult or miniscule by our own personal measuring tape." Ken Boa

Yup, that's what I read in my devotional this morning...in red, glowing, larger-than-life letters.

Remember when you were a kid and your parents told you, "Trust me, this will be good for you?"And it always was? Even if it did hurt a little?

Well, it seems like my Heavenly Father has that same belief system...

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...or something like that.

You see, in a moment of unreserved passion, I volunteered to lead a study with the same group I had just done Truth Project with. (Yeah, I know, you're not supposed to end a sentence with "with" but right now that does not seem important.)

This Righteous Living series seemed a perfect follow-up to Truth Project...what to do with all the head knowledge we had just gained.

So this fool rushed in where angels dared not go and volunteered to lead it.

On suffering well

The other day I went to visit a dear friend who is suffering with shingles in her eyes and on her head.

She was in utter agony...face scrunched in pain, pale and gray in color.

I went there bearing tulips (her favorite flowers) and balloons and chocolate (her favorite food) seeking to encourage her, kind friend that I am.

I don't know what I was thinking...probably that I had something to offer...some word or prayer that would make everything better.

But what confronted me was such suffering that I trembled before it...tears in my eyes and sadness in my heart that such a woman of God should suffer in this way.

I mean really, she's been through so much already. How much is enough, Lord?

You need to know that she is THE one earthly person I most aspire to be like when, and if, I ever grow up.

She is wise...loving...caring for all creation and people passionately.

She knows how to comfort and her empathy knows no bounds.

Is she perfect? No. And she'll be the first to tell you! But I think she's pretty gosh darn close on an earthly scale.

So, where is all this going you ask?

Because today I want to ramble on the subject of suffering.

Because if you and I haven't already suffered, our time is coming. Count on it.

And we need to be ready.

A great deal of preparation for suffering is simple, but it must be done now, before suffering comes in like a tsunami and we are left reeling.

Missing Christmas

This year I missed it.

You see, every year there comes a moment during the Christmas season when I "get it"...

When everything comes together and a flash of understanding invades my hectic life...

When I meet the Christ of Christmas.

Christ amidst the hustle and bustle, glitter and lights, food and festivities.

Who He is. What His coming meant. Why I am called to celebrate the Incarnation.

It is a gift He has always bestowed on me and one I have come to eagerly anticipate.

But this year it didn't come.

I missed it.

At least that's what I thought.

When Christmas looks like a pile of broken pottery

It was only yesterday.

Or a lifetime ago...it's hard to remember now.

At the time it was all too real, and I wondered if I would live through it.

But as you can see, I have.

Like they say, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Amen to that.

We were living in southern Mexico at the time, working at a Bible Translation Center.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

But the one time I want to talk about today is a time that comes back to me...

Christmas after Christmas after Christmas.

Probably because I need to be reminded...

And then there was Light!

It's that time of year...the time of year when I get asked the same question over and over and over again, "What do you want for Christmas?"

This morning as I was rummaging through my stack of Advent devotionals wondering which one to use this year, two questions kept running through my mind...

"My daughter, what do you want this Christmas? What is your heart's desire?" 

And that made me stop. And lean back. And stare out the window at the nativity on our deck and the golden ornaments swaying in the breeze high above it.

What is my heart's desire?

I want those I love who do not know You to find their hope and joy in You this year...not in the transient things of this world.

I want the lonely to be embraced. Acknowledged. Known.

I want the hungry to be fed...not only physical but spiritual food...food that lasts not just for a day, but for all eternity.

And a million other things...

But what I want most is You...and for the world to see You in the midst of all the hustle and bustle, glitter and decorations, noise and fervor.

Christ in Christmas.

That is my heart's desire...To know You and make You known.

But how, Lord?

Leaning on a reed? Timber!

You know how in the Bible when something is said three times that it is very, very important?

That you need to pay attention or you are going to miss something you shouldn't?

Like Holy. Holy. Holy.

That means Holy. To the max. Holy inside out, through and through. Super important!

So I'm wondering if it works the same way when God smacks you in the face with the same truth three times in one week?

Is He trying to get your attention?

Yeah, that's what I thought.

I've been going through one of those times...you know, those times where you are slogging through a minefield rather than skipping through a daisy field?

Where you know you're heading somewhere because you are following that very tiny itsy-bitsy light in front of you...

But the process is so slow, and the terrain so unknown, that each baby step is an adventure in faith?

Now I have been trying my very best to be patient. With myself. And especially with God.

But sometimes it seems like nothing is changing.

So I can become a wee bit impatient...

Wanting to take things into my own hands to move things along. You know, help Him out a little.

Not good.

Not good at all.

So what is this "three-times-inflicted-lesson" that God smacked me with? (Don't blame God, I deserved it!)

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; don't lean on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths." Prov. 3:5,6

Oh, I love that one! It's so easy to quote to others!

But when it comes to saying it to myself...HA!

So, the order of events...

What the world is dying for

Quiz time! How would you fill in the blank below?

A world that dies for a lack of____________.

Food?

Water?

Nope, neither one of those, though sadly both are true.  But I'm thinking of something else.

Love. That's the word I'm thinking of.

A world that dies for a lack of love.

I read that this morning and it has been haunting me ever since...